Reviewing someone else’s Top 25 Metal Albums of All Time list recently, it struck me that despite the radically different music represented by the bands, there had to be some constants- there had to be certain characteristics shared by most, if not all of the greatest metal albums of all time.

The question arose- if metal is constantly changing, then what makes a great metal album? Without a mold, how do we know when someone breaks one?

So I compiled a list of the 50 greatest metal albums ever and started ripping through their guts to see what I might find.

I know, I know- you just sat up straight when you read the word “list.” Nothing simultaneously delights and enrages a music fan like a list. Even when we want to agree with a list, we are genetically wired to call bullshit, to say it’s incomplete and to fill ourselves with fury and outrage that the compiler had the big brass balls to exclude this band or that band from the list, or even worse, to place one band ahead of another, when even my girlfriend knows that the first band is sucky and derivative, and…

Well, you get it.

So listen closely:

This is not a list.

I repeat:

This is not a list. It is a group of great albums.

My goal was to lump together a representation of the most influential metal albums of all time and see what these albums shared.

But first I had to set some guidelines:

• I compiled my own list of top metal albums and then scoured the Internet for other lists to account for different tastes and opinions. The final group contains 53 albums, which I will include at the end of the article. Don’t be offended if you feel that an album is unjustly missing- remember, I’m looking for trends, not making a definitive list. One or two albums won’t alter my findings by any measurable amount. And “why not 50,” you ask? Because I wasn’t prepared to eliminate essential albums merely to end with an “even” number.
• For the purposes of this list, AC/DC counts as metal, even though today most would understandably classify them as “hard rock.” AC/DC, like Black Sabbath, rolled out a sound that was mind-blowingly heavy at the time and their contribution to metal should not be ignored simply because harder bands have since taken metal to greater extremes.  AC/DC appeared in about half of the Top Metal Album lists that I found.
• Where I looked at chart positions, I only looked at the US and UK charts. While it was tempting to factor in European and South American charts, the significant majority of music sales occur in the US and UK, so for expedience I focused on those two countries.
• I only looked at original releases. A staggering percentage of legendary albums have been re-released with extra tracks as bonus material. An album makes its mark on the day it is released and it lives or dies from that point.
• To waste space telling you that a metal masterpiece is full of gravity sized-guitars, explosive choruses and themes of rage and rebellion would be as enlightening as telling you that what makes a triumphant pizza is sauce, cheese and crust. I am avoiding discussions of the more obvious properties of heavy metal as these properties can be found on any metal record in some measure and are not unique to the great ones.

Having rolled up my sleeves and pored through nearly 40 hours of metal albums, I found that it is actually far easier to illustrate what is not essential to a classic metal record.

Here we go.

A great metal album does not need a flashy producer

Sure, Rick Rubin produced Slayer’s Reign in Blood, which tops many lists as the greatest metal album of all time.  But can you guess what other album gets a lot of number one votes? You got it- Metallica’s Master of Puppets, produced by Denmark’s Flemming Rasmussen.

Who?

Exactly.

Rasmussen was the 26 –year old co-owner of a studio in Copenhagen when the boys from Metallica rolled through to record what would be the Ride the Lightning album. Rasmussen had produced Rainbow’s 1981 Difficult to Cure record, so this was not his first rodeo. However, he had never heard Metallica until they arrived at his studio, which makes his effort all the more horns-worthy, because he took four guys whom he had never met and from them coaxed one of humanity’s greatest heavy metal assaults.

The band (and the record buyers of planet Earth) liked the results so much that they brought him in for the next two albums, Master of Puppets and …And Justice for All, both of which appear in the list.

So you don’t need a Rick Rubin, a Bob Rock or even a Mutt Lange- you just need a cat who gets where you’re coming from and who’s got the balls to stand up to the band when they’re bringing anything less than their best.

A classic metal album does not have to come from the 80s

The 80s were the greatest decade that heavy metal and hard rock have ever seen. Oh sure, Culture Club and Michael Jackson were laughing all the way to the bank as the dance clubs of the world were stuffed with coked-out yuppies marveling at how affordable the new $6/minute cell phone rates were. But that was the commercial side of music- the most timeless and groundbreaking metal that the world had ever heard was being churned out on the fringes. And we’re not talking about the hair band craze- we’re talking about Iron Maiden, Metallica, Dio, Helloween, King Diamond, Overkill, Saxon and Megadeth. In fact, nearly 70% of the albums in my list were released in the 80s.

However, it would be easy and grotesquely unfair to write off the music before the 80s as classic rock precursors to metal, just as it would be nothing short of criminal to write off the metal of the past 20 years as derivative. People who complain that non-80s metal is sub-par are probably the same cats who used to pay $6/minute for their lunchbox-sized cell phone.

Metal was born in 1968 with Blue Cheer’s Vincebus Eruptum. In the 70s, Black Sabbath took the Cheer’s sound all the way up to 11 and became metal’s pioneers with a trio of albums that changed heavy music more profoundly than anything to date (Black Sabbath, Paranoid, Sabbath Bloody Sabbath). The 70s also saw essential releases from Judas Priest, Rainbow and Deep Purple that stand up astonishingly well even amid today’s digital production technologies.

Pantera kept metal’s flag flying in the 90s, with one middle finger extended to the shoegazing grunge crowd and another towards the “alternative” revolution (which was about as alternative as the Banana Republic).

The new millennium has seen bands like Mastodon, Opeth and Trivium contribute essential advancements to metal that not only continue what Blue Cheer started over 40 years ago, but that suggest mind-blowing possibilities for the bands to come.

A band doesn’t need an image to release a metal album for the ages.

Dave Mustaine, with his ginger curls and perma-sneer can hardly get to his car in the morning without being recognized. Same with Kerry King and his tattooed dome. There are some metal musicians who, intentionally or not, have acquired notoriety that extends beyond metal- through their looks or dirty deeds, their personae have extended out into pop culture and they are therefore recognizable to people who couldn’t tell the difference between an Ozzy-era Sabbath song or one off of the Mob Rules.

Whether it’s leather-clad Rob Halford on his motorcycle or Lemmy’s Confederate hat and handlebar mustache, some metal guys are irreversibly part of mainstream awareness.

Then there are the guys in bands like Testament, who could wear stickers that say “HELLO! My name is… Chuck… and I’m in Testament” and they’d still have to wait in line to get a drink. Same with bands like Venom, Helloween, Accept, and Fate’s Warning- they are generally unrecognizable to anyone but their families and most ardent fans, yet they anonymously released spectacularly brutal metal epics that continue to attract attention even though 99% of music fans wouldn’t recognize the bands if they were throwing up on their front lawn.

Critically, these bands show that explosive new music will stand on its own, apart from the trappings of looks or image.

A timeless heavy metal masterpiece need not come from a major label

Iron Maiden’s run with EMI has been one for the ages. EMI released their debut, Iron Maiden, in 1980 and thirty years later, Maiden released their 15^th studio album with EMI, for a total of 28 albums together.

But while most of the albums in the list have been released by a major record label, many of the genre’s most definitive releases have come from indie labels run by people who simply loved metal as much as the bands playing it.

Brian Slagel was a guy who ran around Orange County back in the 80s, grooving to NWOBHM tapes with his buddy Lars Ulrich and a small group of ferociously dedicated metalheads. They would drive halfway across the county to find rare bootlegs from UK bands like Angel Witch and Saxon. In 1982, Slagel decided to start his own label to help promote some of the genre’s underrated diamonds, like Metallica (and Ratt). In 1983, this upstart label released Slayer’s Show No Mercy album, and then Hell Awaits two years later. These dispatches set the stage for Slayer’s subsequent releases on Def Jam (Reign in Blood, South of Heaven), but without the faith of Slagel and the investment of Metal Blade, one is left to wonder how far Slayer might have gone.

New York’s Megaforce records had an even more unlikely beginning, signing up acts like Metallica and Anthrax while co-founder Jonny Zazula was finishing up a jail sentence in a halfway house. Megaforce was built on the savings account and dwindling credit line of Zazula and his wife, eventually releasing classic albums from bands like Overkill, Testament, Anthrax, Metallica and Ministry. From the Zazula’s modest basement sprung the roots of one of music’s most titanic revolutions.

Sure, the deep pockets and marketing machinery of a big label are the preferred resources for any band, metal or otherwise, but our list of classic metal albums establishes that to roll out a tour de force, all you need is a small label with lots of heart and a briefcase full of guts, and the music will lead the way.

A groundbreaking metal album does not require great vocals

Of the list, this is perhaps the most obvious. Sure, guys like Bruce Dickinson, Ronnie James Dio and Rob Halford have informed the definition of metal with voices strong enough to float container ships. But for every Dio there’s a Lemmy and for every Dickinson, an Ozzy. Simply put, a traditionally strong voice is negotiable when it comes to releasing a supreme metal record.

The key to the success of a sub-par vocalist is that the music must serve the singing, and not the other way around. Motörhead’s speed metal frenzy and playful, often disposable lyrics make Lemmy’s voice not just listenable, but iconic. Same with Ozzy, who couldn’t carry a tune if it had handles on each side, which is why he double tracked his vocals on his solo albums- to beef up a glaring weakness. But the band, led by Randy Rhoads and Bob Daisley, wrote songs in Ozzy-friendly keys and with an overall sound that made Ozzy shine, lumbering vocals and all.

Ozzy is one of the greatest examples of someone who has brought minimal raw talent to the table, but who has more than compensated for his shortcomings with a mixture of hard work and a supporting cast of audaciously talented musicians.

A landmark metal album need not contain offensive, close-minded lyrics

“It’s loud and stupid.”

That’s what you hear when people who don’t like metal attempt to justify their position. We can gladly concede the loud part- metal is best enjoyed at towering volumes that tend to push back the fuzz on your eardrums. Fine.

The “stupid” part, however, is a grossly inaccurate stereotype propagated by people outside of the know- people whose idea of heavy metal is the image of poufy-haired Bret Michaels and his zippy little band of crossdressers singing about nothing but good times and obese women and whose deepest song was a straight-faced ballad about the irony of roses having thorns.

Sure, my list of metal albums contains plenty of songs that extol the sublime pleasures of wine, women and song (and quite often, heroin). But those themes are squarely in the minority amid an ocean of truly eloquent and unflinchingly candid lyrics that speak of rebellion, rage and freedom.

Queensryche’s Operation Mindcrime is only one of the many examples of thought-provoking, creative ideas presented though the medium of hard charging melodic metal. Oppression, insurrection, truth and deep human emotions are explored as effectively as they are in some of the twentieth century’s most enduring books.

Other albums such as Maiden’s The Number of the Beast and Slayer’s Reign in Blood confront historical atrocities through shotgun blast anthems that are as bruising as they are poetic.

Nor does a great metal album require intellectually-rich themes or lyrics

Having established that influential heavy metal need not involve dumbed-down odes to buffoonery, we must also point out that metal isn’t exactly curing cancer, either. AC/DC, Motörhead, Black Sabbath and Judas Priest are all examples of bands that have released profoundly influential metal albums that unapologetically praise the exquisite joys of sex, drugs and rock and roll.

This isn’t to say that lyrics aren’t important to a metal album- as long as the lyrics reflect the band’s integrity and serve the music, heavy metal can talk about whatever it damn well wants.

A classic metal masterpiece does not require radio play

There are a thousand reasons why commercial radio hates metal, from the scary album covers that freak out parents to the seven minute songs that eat up valuable advertising minutes. Yet without the benefit of friendly DJs and prime time programming slots, metal’s most celebrated albums have sold millions. While word of mouth has been critical to the success of albums by King Diamond and Saxon, these albums have ultimately risen to critical heights on the backs of long, hard, ass-breaking tours.

With the commercialization of the Internet came an onslaught of streaming radio stations that were no longer advertiser dependent. From the leviathans of Sirius and XM to independent mainstays like HardRadio, metal is finally receiving more airplay than ever. Guys like Eddie Trunk are leading the charge for the next generation, preaching metal to the masses from his radio pulpit to his notoriously popular television show “That Metal Show,” on VH1 Classic.

Admittedly, the people tuning into these specialty stations and programs have already been converted- they are metalheads looking for more metal. But true metal has no place in the mainstream, anyway. There are too many rules to follow to get a precious slice of commercial radio and it’s a given that any album that has been crafted to appeal to mainstream radio is by definition, not metal.

A great metal record does not need bass

From Geezer Butler’s monolithic bass lines to John Myung’s unrivaled technical proficiency, the bass has evolved in the field of heavy metal much in the same way that the stone wheel has evolved in the field of transportation. The bass adds more than rhythm now- it contributes melody and compositional complexity that goes far beyond anything that was happening in metal’s early days.

That being said, if there’s one thing that we learned from Metallica’s …And Justice for All, it’s that a great metal album doesn’t need bass.

Flemming Rasmussen, who produced that album, watched Jason Newsted record all of his bass parts for that release, describing his efforts as nothing short of “brilliant.” Yet as we all know by now, egos and circumstances (the still-recent death of Cliff Burton), conspired against Newsted’s efforts, with the band directing that his parts be mixed so low that they are barely detectable. Yet the album continues to stand among that band’s top efforts and rests comfortably in my Top 50 list below.

That being said, I doubt there will ever be a great metal record released from here on in without a strong bass presence.

Having covered what a great album is not, here are my five key findings after sorting through mankind’s most hallowed heavy metal releases. Bands that are looking to record the next metal masterpiece should pay close attention to these:

Great metal albums don’t show the band in the cover art.

With a small handful of exceptions, almost every classic metal album in my list has a graphic for the cover instead of a picture of the band. The graphics are anything from paintings to logos to simple graphic designs. Musicians age quickly and even metal fashion can be fickle, but a good graphic, like Iron Maiden’s Eddie or Megadeth’s Vic Rattlehead, are timeless.

40 of the 53 albums featured graphics as cover art. Of the remaining 13, many were photographs that were manipulated to the point of looking like paintings. Three, the two Ozzy albums and Motörhead, were nothing but campy pictures of the musicians.

The best metal in the world comes from either the US or the UK.

I can hear the black metal crowd cursing me already, but a review of the top albums shows that just over ten percent of the top metal albums have been released outside of the US and UK. Australia, Germany, Denmark and Sweden are the remaining countries.

Somewhere in Iceland, a Dimmu Borgir fan is shaking his fist in my general direction…

Timeless metal albums are meaty.

The average album length was 45 minutes. Most albums fell in between 40 and 45 minutes. Bands like Slayer and Motörhead came in well under the mean, while Mastodon’s Blood Mountain took the crown for longest classic metal album, ticking off over 68 minutes of brain-melting prog metal.

So if you’re a band looking to enter the Valhalla of Metal Greatness, be prepared to give your fans their money’s worth.

Metal by numbers (Cookie, cookie, cookie!)

40 of the 53 albums had between 8 and 10 songs. Ten albums contained more songs and only three contained fewer. It stands to reason that if you want to make a statement with your album, the sweet spot is between 8 and 10 great songs. Anything less isn’t a statement, it’s an EP, and anything more runs the risk of diluting the quality. Avoid increasing the total with filler and you might just have the next monster release.

The US will like you, but the UK will love you.

The US might represent success for artists in other genres but if you’re a metal band, the UK is where it’s at.  Not all of the albums in the list made the charts (only 8 albums failed to chart in either the US or the UK), but out of the ones that did, only 18% charted higher in the US than in the UK. Of the 72% that charted higher in the UK, most of them didn’t just chart higher in Europe, but they charted significantly higher in the UK.

You’re dying to know which 8 albums triumphed in the US, aren’t you? Fine- here they are:

Metallica- Master of Puppets, Queensryche- Operation Mindcrime, W.A.S.P.- W.A.S.P., Megadeth- Peace Sells But Who’s Buying and Countdown to Extinction, Scorpions- Blackout, Overkill- The Years of Decay, Mastodon- Blood Mountain

Alright all you up-and-coming metal bands. You’ve seen the new rules- not get out there and shatter them.