Monthly archives: February, 2016


Award

I’m Live Blogging The Oscars Because I’m Overpowered By A Crippling Sense Of Self-Loathing

6:06 p.m. I just turned the Awards on and some stilted Justin Bieber lookalike is warbling some crap-assed monument to overproduction in a skin-blistering falsetto. I hope it gets better. 6:08 They’re talking about The Big Short right now, which was a great book, and playing Nirvana as they show a montage from that movie.



COOPS-0432

My Dog Has No Regard For Personal Space

Jesus.



Ratt

Thirty-Seven Men Have Played In Ratt; Wouldn’t It Be Great If They All Released An Autobiography?

It’s been twenty-eight years since Ratt released anything vaguely approaching even the most generous definition of “newsworthy.” That would be 1988’s Reach For The Sky, which gave the world Way Cool Jr. and I Want A Woman. While that record extended their platinum-certification streak to four (it would also bring that streak to a close),



white person dancing

I Just Discovered A Human Being Who Dances Even Worse Than I Do

Skip to 1:27. If I saw somebody twitching like this at a wedding reception, I’d call the paramedics. You can tell by the way she keeps stopping that Hillary can’t wait for the song to end, BUT IT WON’T! She falls back on that swimming-fish thing with her hand, but still can’t find the rhythm,